Cheap-o “Moscato”

Because quotation marks don’t make food sound sketchy at all.

So today my mom wanted me to chill out because she thought I was being too irritable with her. Naturally, she decided the way to do this would be to give me alcohol (we’ll discuss parenting later).

Anyway, since there wasn’t any Moscato on sale at the store this week, momma decided to improvise. Here’s what she did.

+ 1 Bottle Cheap White Wine
+ 1 Can Sprite (or any similar soda)
+ Ice
+ Cherry (optional, I’m just a fancy fuck)
1. Seriously? Isn’t it kind of obvious what to do with that?

Calories: you’re drinking, who the fuck even cares?

So there you go! Alcohol that tastes kinda like Moscato. And if it doesn’t taste like Moscato, then shut up and drink more alcohol until you stop caring what it tastes like.

– Rhinibanini


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